Confucius Sez

• Woman who go to man's apartment for snack, gets tit-bit.
• Man who gets kicked in balls, left holding the bag.
• Passionate kiss like spider web ... lead to undoing of fly.
• Man with hole in pocket, feel cocky all day.
• Virginity like balloon ... one prick, all gone.
• Girl who rides bicycle, peddles ass all over town.
• Man who farts in church, sits in own pew.
• Man who live in glass house, dress in basement.
• Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
• Man with penis in peanut butter jar is fucking nuts.
• Man who walk through airport door sideways is going to Bangkok.
• Man who drop watch in toilet, bound to have shitty time.
• Man who take lady on camping trip, have one intent.
• Woman who fly upside down, have crack up.
• Man who go to bed with question of sex on mind wake up with solution well in hand.
• Girl who do back spring on bedspring have offspring next spring
• Secretary not permanent, till screwed on desk.
• A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
• Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
• Man who run behind car get exhausted.
• Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger.
• Man with athletic finger make broad jump.
• He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
• Man who speaks with forked tongue should not kiss balloons.
• Man who lose key to apartment not get new key.
• Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert.
• Wash your face in the morning, neck at night.
• He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.
• Elevator smell different to midget.
• He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.
• Wife who put man in dog house find him in cat house.
• Man who farts in church sits alone in pew.
• Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.
• Man who marries a girl with no bust has right to feel low down.
• Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts.
• Seven days on honeymoon make one hole weak.
• Woman who springs on inner-spring this spring, gets off-spring next spring
• Nail on board is not good as screw on bench.
• Short man who dance with tall woman get bust in mouth.
• Man who lay woman on ground has peace on earth.
• Man who sleep on railroad tracks wake up with split personality.
• Baseball very strange game. How can man with 4 balls walk?
• Man who kisses girl's behind, gets crack in face.
• Woman who spends much time on bedspring, may have offspring.
• Man and mouse alike, both end up in pussy.
• Man who sucks nipples make clean breast of things.
• Man who fights with wife all day, gets no peace at night.
• Man who snatches kisses when young, kisses snatches when old.
• Wife who slides down banister makes monkey shine.
• Girl who douches with vinegar walk around with sour puss.
• He who sneezes without a handkerchief takes matters into his own hands.
• Man who have head up ass, have shitty outlook on life.
• Man who have hand in pocket not just jingling change.
• A streaker is someone who is unsuited for his work.
• He who make oral love to epileptic woman may get tongue-tied.
• He who make love to exhaust pipe of car have hot rod.
• Epileptic woman who give blow-job may bite big one.
• Sleepy man who stand behind car get exhausted.
• Sleepy man who stand in front of car get tired.
• Man who go to bed with itchy ass, wakes up with smelly fingers.
• Man who stand on toilet, must be high on pot.
• Man who have hand in pockets, not crazy, just feeling nuts.